If something's not working, then you're in the right place. Just
answer "yes" or "no" to the following questions, and all will be well.

.....

Well, maybe not "well" but well enough.

.....

First, we'll have to inquire a bit as to the functional status of the item or subject in question.

More to the point...

 

 

The following pages contain profanity. If that's okay with you, then proceed.